When Things Cant Get Any Worse

It’s hard to really imagine what would have happenned if Al Gore had been President during the 9/11 attacks. Assumming they happenned as they did under Bush, an event of that magnitude would have by its’nature necessitated some kind of response, and a quick and decisive one. Otherwise, that along with other factors would have insured that, given the degree of closeness in the 2000 election, George W. Bush would have made a comeback in 2004, would have been decisively elected, and then, of course, we would be faced with the prospect of a George W. Bush re-election campaign in 2008.

But what could Gore have done, really? I have no doubt he would have beaten the diplomacy door to death, and may have dropped a few bombs, notably on Kandahar, before reaching some kind of UN brokered agreement which would have necessitated Osama Bin Laden being “invited to peacefully leave” Afghanistan. This of course would have been unsatisfactory.

But there was obvioulsy no chance the Taliban was going to turn Bin Laden over, or betray him in any manner. Therefore, Gore would have had little choice but to invade, with probably similar results as today as regards the current Afghan situation.

On the other hand, Bin Laden, if there had been an invasion and war, may have been apprehended or killed. One thing for certain, the Iraqi adventure would never have transpired. This means, of course, Saddam would still be in power, would still be a thorn in our sides, but such is life.

We would still doubtless, at least up until 2004, been experiencing ever growing record budget surpluses, despte the tech stock bubble bust, which anybody with a shred of common sense knew was inevitable. But this would have been tweaked, and dealt with, maybe even to some degree by a series of tax cuts. But I have no doubt, however it turned out, we would not be experiencing the record deficits we are currently undergoing.

Illegal immigration would have been a continually on-going problem, there would be nothing in the way of any kind of medical health care reform, and the Repulican controlled Congress would have fought Gore tooth and nail resisting any kind of comprehensive energy and environmental reforms, and they would have done so successfully.

But the one thing that would have killed Gore in 2004, would have been Al Gore. You see, in the election of the year 2000, Al Gore was cheated out of his destiny-the destiny to become a one term president. In 2004, people would have been dreamily heralding Bush with the same kind of whimsical “if only we would have elected him in 2000” attitude that people to a large degree are currently considering Gore. And he would have won.

The result-we would eventually be going through pretty much the same thing we are going through now, only four years later, and I have no doubt for four years longer. The prospect of a two term Bush presidency extending until January of 2013, while a sobering thought, would have been an inevitability. Gores one claim to success may have been his handling of the Afghan conflcit.

Only there may never have been one, because-there may never have been a terrorist attack during a Gore presidency. Gore and his administration may well have acted on the intelligence that New York Times reporter Judith Miller is now insisting the Bush Administration had access to some weeks before the attack. Bus and his people seem to ave ignored any such warnings. Some would assert tey did so purposefully, with the intention of using the event to their own political advantage. It would be easy after all, this early in the first Bush term, to blame it on the lax, all too casual culture of the Clinton Administration. Which they certainly did do, actually.

Whether Bush and/or his top people did this purposefully, or whether they simply didn’t have enough information as to when and where the attacks would transpire to warrant taking any action that mght have resulted in a panick, to say nothing of accussations of political gamesmanship, we may never know. And of course it is also impossible to know whether Gores people would have prevented the attacks, or how they would have responded had they occurred.

If Gore had prevented the attacks, of course, he would have gotten little or no credit for ahving prevented such a large scae attack, as the psychological impact just would not have been a fraction as great. It would not show up as so much as a blip on the 2004 electoral radar screen.

Now, of course, Gore insists he has no intention of running for the presidency in 2008. If true, too bad. Because I have no doubt that, ifthe curent situation continues, with both parties, the way it currently is going, Gore is the one Democrat who could, conceivably not only win the Presidency, but bring with him sufficient coattails to control both houses of Congress, probably by a substantail margin.

Clinton, were she to win, could not accomplsh this, not at this stage. Neither could Biden, Feingold, O’Bama, Kerry, Edwards, Clark, Richardson, or any of the other current Democratic hopefuls. Gore could. He could also, given his degree of very real if unrecognized passion for the burning issues of the day, conceivably go down in history as one of the great ones.

You see, there is a reason Bill Clinton chose Al Gore to be his running mate that fateful day in 1992. Al Gore made Bill Clinton respectable. Al Gore made Bill Clinton electable. And the Republican party never forgave Al Gore for that, and have spent every waking moment since that day in an effort to belittle him, to ridicule him-dehumanize him, even.

Yes, Al Gore is the best potential possible Democratic candidate for president of the Untied States. The only thing he needs to have is the unmitigated desire to run, and the self-confidence to let his real, human side show in the course of a campaign, and the common sense to not only not listen to the wrong advisors, but to curtly show them the door.

Pompous Circumstances

Here’s a story for all you education reform advocates, one that should really give you pause. A high school in Ohio, will not be graduating 16 students this year. The reason? Despite being given an entire school year to do so, these sixteen students did not produce a required essay, between eight and ten pages in length, on a subject of their choice, that required them to shadow one source. Let that sink in for a minute. It could have been on any subject. It could have been about popular culture. It could have been about social issues. It could have been about cooking. It could have been about any damn thing they wanted it to be on. And they had a whole fucking year to do it.

But, they didn’t, and of course, as you might have expected, some parents are up in arm, and are demanding the requirements be non-binding. The school staff evidently has a collective spine, as well as balls, because they are refusing, as they put it, to lower their standards.

This is really incredible. I mean, how fucking hard can it be? It’s not like they were being requested to produce a volume on the level of a college graduate student thesis. This is more on the fucking level of “What I Did For My Summer Vacation.”

It’s no fucking wonder, to me, that American kids are falling steadily behind students of other nations in Math and Science. I give it ten years, and American students are going to be significantly behind kids from Germany, India, Iran, and China-

IN MOTHRFUCKING ENGLISH!!!

Living In A Bubble

The state legislature of Ohio has actually done something notably good, for once. Even more remarkable, they accomplished this feat on a bipartisan bais, passing by a significant margin a bill that will outlaw preatory lending practices. This seems to be targeted mostly at home mortgage lenders, but it would seem as though the implications of the bill might well be much broader than this. Governor Bob Taft has assurred the legislature he will probably sign the bill into law after an obligatory review process.

This is really a first. In fact, the total number of votes against the bill in the Ohio State Senate were three. Industry arguments and oppossition to the bill were weak, and amounted to warnings that some couples with bad credit histories might be adversely affected (though I would submit not as adversely affected were they to take out a mortgage with one of these sharks had the bill not been signed).

I hope this is the opening salvo in what will become a nationwide trend, one that will hopefully extend far beyond this sector of the economy, and on to the heinous predatory practices of loan companies, banks, and credit lenders nationwide.

For example, credit card companies should never be allowed to up their interest rates to more than ten percent more than the rate at which the consumer originally signed on at, and the possibility of this raise in rates should be explicitly spelled out in

BIG BOLD LETTERS THAT STAND OUT LIKE THIS AT THE TOP OF THE FUCKING AGREEMENT!

Also, interest charges on loans made to college students should never, under any circumstances, be allowed to rise up into double digit territory. This would go a long way toward solving a lot of problems, for example, the high cost of health care, which to a large extent is a result of these predatory loanng practices. Yet, credit card companies, and their supporters in Congress and state legislatures, are ever resistant to laws designed to curb these practices on college campuses.

For the time being, this law targeted at predatory home mortgage lending, is a good first step, though it is applicable to Ohio law and domain only. Still, it seems to have come just int he nick of time, a time when the housing bubble seems to have finally reached it's zenith, in a lot of areas of the country.

In fact, there are now ever increasing instances of homes that have set opn the market unsold, for weeks, even months. No one is selling. Because more and more, nobody is buying-not at these rates.

And so, it looks as though George Bush's credit card economy might well be on the way to seeing one of the mainstays of it's strength dwindling. The much touted housing market. No, the bubble hasn't exactly burst. But the air is leaking out, slowly, perhaps, but definitely.

The Fifth Nail

I was recently reminded on another Blog, by the name of Hillbilly White Trash, of the presence of pedophilia sites on the Internet. I informed the site owner, Lemuel, that the archives of one such blog, known as the Fifth nail, might well still be availiable. Upon checking, he found out that, indeed, they were.

The Fifth Nail happens to be the blog kept by the monster Joseph Duncan, who kidnapped the two little Groene children from their home in Idaho. he ended up murdering the young boy, while thankfully the young girl, Shasta, was recovered alive and relatively unharmed, though she had been subjected to ongong sexual abuse durng her captivity. Additionally, of course, Duncan murdered their motehr, step-father, and an older brother during the course of abducting her.

It was a horrible story, and when I found out about the presence of the Fifth Nail on Blogger, of course I checked it out. It was amussing in a weird sort of way to see the hundreds of dreogatory remarks lodged against Duncan in the comments section of his blog, which had all been posted after the fact of his capture. I mean, really, he’s in jail now. He’s not going to be reading them, so why bother?

But the remarkable thing about this blog was that the last post seems to have been written while he was on the run from the law, and wanted for thus violating the termsof his parole. If I read it right. All of which begs the question. Where was Joseph Duncan when he posted tis last blog item? Was he perhaps in that small town in Idaho? Possibly availing himslef of the services of the computers at the library? Is that perhaps where he initialymade contact with one or both of the Groene children? Had he perhaps inadverdantly, fromthis contact, perhaps even by back tracking over their computer usage, soehwoe learned their names, and eventually their addresses?

Or did his familiarity with them precede this? The childrens biological father is a biker, and so was Duncan, who in fact had asociates among a Chrisitan oriented bikers club in the stae of Washington.

Or, was it no more than a matter of hwat it has been alleged, that, while on the run, he happenned across the childrens home, spying htem in the yard from a distance, from off the interstae, all a matterof being in the right place, for his needs, at tehright time.

I recommend your visit to these archives only if you have the stomach, as it is a stomach churning experience, but, alas, an eye opening one as well. You will find the Fifth Nail here.

In addition, I also recommend a visit to Lemuels blog, Hillbilly White Trash. He’s a politcal conservative, a sincerely genuine one, who also has a liking for science fiction, guns, Celtic music, and quality food and beer, as well as what he refers to as the Ashville (North Carolina) vortex. Even if you don’t agree with his politics, his blog is enjoyable, and well worth a visit, even if you are not actually qualified, as I am probably not, to be a member of what he calls “The Hillbilly Eco-System.”

Neverthelss, even if you can't realy live here, it's a cool place to visit.

Paul McCartney Heather Mills Beatles Theme Song Poll

Okay, I promised I wasn’t going to engage in any little trite inclusions of Beatles tunes lyrics in any post discussing the breakup of Paul McCartney to his wife, Heather “Stumpy” Mills, but on the other hand, I Should Have Known Better (ouch) than to think I could avoid it all together. So, just in the spirit of good clean fun, the question has to be asked-what Beatles song best describes the way MacCartney must be feeling right now.

The Fool On The Hill

Ticket To Ride

Oh Darling

When I’m Sixty Four

Don’t Bother Me

Wah-Wah

I Want You (She’s So Heavy)

Yer Blues

Photograph

Long Long Long

Everybody’s Got Something To Hide Except For Me And My Monkey

Sexey Sadie

A whole albums worth of material, that should probably be compiled and sent to our beleaguered former mop top, with which he can console and torture himself, with Ringo even chiming in. After all, his investment in this sham of a marriage was all of- what, four years, for the low, low price of, probably, once the dust has settled and the papers are signed, an estimated 500 million dollars.

You were right the first time, Paul. Money can’t buy you love. (Oh, what the fuck)

24-An Explosive Finale

The coming season finale of 24 is promising as usual a big surprise, so of course as a 24 fanatic and mystery addict, I’m geared up,and keyed up, for what could be hopefully the best season ending ever. So far, the show has not dissappointed, despite several incidents of dubious and unlikely circumstances.

Okay, for one thing, Russian military submarines are unlikely to be docked at US ports. For another, how exactly is it that civilians make their way onto diplomatic flights in a city that has beenunder martial law for the course of eight hours? More importantly, how is it that an ex-Preisdent, receiving information pertaining to the illegal acts of the curent President, trust said current presidents wife to keep him abreast of events, when he should have every reason to be aware that said First Lady is a few cards shy of a full deck.

Okay, despte all these obvious flaws, the show is gripping, and I still have hopes that First Lady Martha Logan will turn out to have been in the throes of Multiple Personality Disorder when she first turned to David palmer, and then betrayed him, leading to his assassination. For now, it looks like her and shining armor encrusted knight Aaron Pierce will somehow manage to escape with their lives intact within minutes of the shows season ending.

That ending wil come, I predict, when Jack Bauer has President Logan cornered, asserting that he will face justice. Jack may well actually assassinate the President, knowing full well this will put him in the historical company of John Wilkes Booth and Lee Harvery Oswald, when suddenly the ending will come. A missile fired from the Russian sub docked at the LA port, recently taken over by Russian (Chechnyan?) terrorists, will hit the Presidential compound, within a minute after jack gets word that one missile was fired before the terrorists could be halted. Logan will be killed by the blast, as will all or most of everybody else within the LA based Presidential retreat. We will have to wait until next season, in January, to learn that jack Bauer has survivd the blast-or will he?

Yes, the show has been renewed for next season, in fact it has been tentatively renewed for three seasons. Yet, there is no word for certain whether Keifer Sutherland will return to the starring role of the drama, and he certainly isnt guaranteed to be kept on forthee seasons.

So, assumming I am right, what clued me in on this scenario? Well, when Jack discovered the Russian sub was being targeted for cpature by the terrorists, the first thing he asked was whether the missiles on the sub were nuclear. He was informed that they were not. Now, thought I, this is quite odd. Why would the writers not have the sub armed with nuclear missiles, instead of ones which were yet deadly enough, Bauer was informd, to take out several city blocks?

Answer-well, a nuked LA would be just a little too much, even for a television show such as 24. So therefore, obviously at least one missile is going to be sucessfully launced, which means-ergo, the Presidential retreat. Goodbye, President Logan, you were fun while you lasted. Great villain. The shows writers sure as hell had me fooled.

Prison Break Season Finale-A Captivated Audience

The season finale of Prison Break sure as hell lived up to the hype, and then some. Maybe, in fact, a little too much. Talk about intense, I bet I approached close to a half pack of cigarrettes during just that hour, which should actually have been extended to two.

And one of my predictions actually came true. The evil female Vice-President engineered the assassination of the president, therefore becoming the “46^th President of The Untied States”.

What happenned to Theodore “T-Bag” Bagwell was gripping as well. Having handcuffed himself to Michael, in order to insue he wasn’t betrayed by John Abruzzi (Peter Stormare), the Maffia boss, (who he knew wanted revenge for the cutting of this throat by T-Bag in an earlier episode) ended up overplaying his hand, and loosing it, to the ax wielding John. T-Bag was left by the others howling pitifully in a barn, his severed left hand beside his face, as he howled in pain and shock.

Such is the acting skills of Robert Knepper that you couldn’t help but feeling sympathy for the character. I had to remind myself that this man was supposed to be in prison for the rest of his life for a series of rape/murders of teenage victims,and during the course of the show had murdered a guard during a prison riot that he instigated, after the guard discovered, along with T-Bag, the tunnel Michael had uncovered as a part of his planned escpae route. He had originally flung the guard into Michaels cell with the intention of raping him. And, so brutal had been his treatment of his former cell-mate that the poor guy ended up hanging himself with his own bed-sheets.

But this isn’t a show about nice people. Even Michael Scoffield (Wentworth Miller), the main character, can be cold and calculating. Once he kept his word to “Tweener”, that he would repay the debt owed him by allowing him to escape, he told him he was then on his own. (Because Tweener, under severe duress, had betrayed the plan to the Chief Prison guard, the cat murdering thug Brad Bellick).

Ironically, Tweener seems to have been the only one to make a clean getaway by crawling inside a horse trailor stopped at a road construction site. Of course, there is Haywire, the insane inmate who muscled in on the escape at the last minute, appearing in the tunnel (having earlier figured out what Michaels tattoos were actually for-diagrams of the prison he had earlier helped design) and threatening to set off an alarm he had hooked up. When he refused to ditch his white suit upon their escape, because he wore nothing under them, they tricked him into going to look for a key in a barn, whereupon John produced the key from under the matt of the car that had been left for them. They then abandoned him. The last he was seen, Haywire,who had stolen a bicycle from a young girl, was going merrilly down the road, pedalling with his arms held high in the air, in his white prison issued clothes and a bicycle helmet.

Unfortunately, the gang didn’t make it to the spot where Johns Mafia associates had a plane waiting to take only three of the prisoners, unbeknownst to the others. This was due in part to the aforementioned handcuffing of T-Bag to Michael, which held up their progress considerably. By the time the remaining five-Michael, Lincoln (Dominic Purcell), John, Sucre, and C-Note-made it to the plane, they were just in time to see it going off, as they waved helplessly for it to come back, Bellick and his guards right behind them. Thus, there was only one other option.

“What are we gong to do?”, one of the escapees asked Michael.

“We’re going to run”, he answered.

And so they did, as the five of them ran with the guards in hot pursuit, a disconcerting distance behind, lights flashing and dogs howling. Meanwhile, T-Bag, clutching his severed hand, with the stump of his left arm covered to stop the flow of blood, was also seen runing in a different area.

Next season promises to be just as gripping. The cons will spend the entire season avoiding capture, while Lincolns lawyer and ex-girlfriend, Veronica Donovan, tries to prove the Vice-President set Lincoln up to take the fall for the murder of her brother-who in the end she discovered was, indeed, still alive, and holed up in a small town in Montana.

Meanwhile, she knows yet another secret of which Michael and Lincoln are yet unaware. John has betrayed them, intending to extract from her, or from them, one way or another, the whereabouts of the informer Fibbonacci, who was responsible for his own prison sentence.

Although it’s too early yet to make predictions, I am hopeful that T-Bag will make good his escape, as he is too good a character to not be a factor. It could be that he is initially captured by Bellick, who then forms a bond with him based on the information that the old con (who died as a result of a fight with Bellick when the latter discovered, thanks to Tweener, the espcape tunnel under the floor of the guard shack the prison work gang were repairing, yet who managed to temporarily incapacitate and bound and gag Bellick inside the tunnel ) had told of five million dollars that he, in his other identity as famed skyjacker D.B. Cooper, had hidden under a silo.

Otherwise, the word is already out that next season will be the last for the show, at the end of which three of the cons will die, two in the next to the last episode, one in the last. Probably in at least one case this will be due to the hunt for the hidden five million, which will doubtless be split up between the remaining five. It would be too easy to think it is obvious which cons will die and which will live. With this show, nothing is certain, one of the best aspects of it.

I just wish more shows could be as good as this one. On the other hand, maybe it’s just as well, my heart can only take so many adrenaline rushes in one weeks time.

The Crossfires Of The Culture Wars

Could the DaVinci Code possibly be that bad a movie, under the direction of Ron Howard. Okay, so the man that brought us “Cinderella Man”, “A Beautiful Mind” and “Apollo 13” has to have a flop every now and then, but shit, Opie Taylor would even make a better movie than this.

Or is it really that bad? It has been criticized as being “too wordy”, by both critics and audiences. Sounds to me like, maybe, cerebral, perhaps? But wouldn’t that describe “A Beautiful Mind”? Of course, to be fair, that movie was never touted as a blood durdling, action packed thriller, exactly. But could DaVinci really be that dull?

Howard has been described by former associates as a “literalist”. When filming Apollo 13, he reportedly insisted that it seem exactly like it would have appearred when the real Apollo 13 blasted off, reminding the crew that this was space flight at a primitve stage. Well, that makes nothing to me but sense. He was reenacting history, after all, dramaticized for sure, but certainly not Captain Piccards Enterprise.

Now, I’m not insinuating that critics, or more precisely the papers that publish them, are succumbing to pressure from the Roman Catholic Church and Opus Dei to present this movie in a less than stellar light, though they have certainly voiced many objections to the subject matter of the film.

I am wondering, nevertheless, if they aren’t subjecting themselves to a bit of subtle internal wariness, and giving in to it. After all, the media has to a large degree been accussed of engaging in various wars on Chrisitanity, and Christmas, and Easter, and Christians in general, for years now. Not that they actually started the war. No, to a great extent that war has been fought out between such varied interest groups as the ACLU, AU, Focus On The Family, and other directly concerned parties. Who actually instigated the war, the party that drew first blood, isnt exactly clear yet to me, but the media has, for the most part, been caught in the crossfires, and have sufferred collateral damage. Sure, a number of media opinion columnists and analysts took upthe challenge, in some cases on the side of the onward Christian soldiers. Sometimes against them. In a lot of cases, they have been in denial of the implications of the conflict.

In almost all cases, they seem now to be sufferring from a marked case of Post Traumatic Stress Syndrome. In a great lot of these cases, reaction to thismovie might be one symptom of this condition.

Conjugal Lewdness

The Christian conservative views concerning abortion, marriage, and birth control are really nothing new. Going back to 1728, no less a personnage than the author Daniel DaFoe, author of the novel Robinson Cruesoe, authored a tract entitled "Conjugal Lewdness: or, Matrimonial Whoredom", which was a treatise warning about the scandalous state of marriage in his day. He later changed the name, at the suggestion of is editors, to "A Treatise Concerning The Use And Abuse Of The Marriage Bed". In the course of this book, he told of a young woan who turned to a neighbor for aid in preventing childbirth. The woman was aghast at what she considered the evil thing the woman was tryingto involve her in, which she assummed to be the seeking of an aborton. But the young married woman responded that no, it wasn’t an abortion she needed, she desired to prevent pregnancy to begin with, and continued to imploe the woman if she knewof any potions that might prevent conception.

DaFoes warning to the English society of his day involved what he considered the degrading effects of such a scourge upon the institution of marriage. it was, he considered, tantamount to a man, if he encouraged such practices, using his wife as no better than a whore. It was such attitudes as this, in fact, that eventually gave rise to the prudishness of the so-caled Victorian Era in English society, a strict code of morality which enlisted growingnumbers of adherents on both continents of Western society.

And this is pretty much what we are seeing today with the Christian conservative movement, in regards to objections to not only abortion, but in ever increasing cases to contraception and to any kind of reasonable, sensible and moderate sex education in public schools as far as anything other than an insistence upon the practice of abstinence. Also in regards to censorship, to intrusions upon art in television, movies, and literature.

And it also explains a good deal about such phenomenon as protests over portrayals of religion in literature and the cinema. It is related to why Christian clergy the world over, in Greece, Italy, Russia, and even India, are up in arms over The DaVince Code, so much so that the movie is for now yet unavailiable for viewing in India, and in other places outraged clergy are asserting that any who see the movie should be killed. A Vatican official has now gone so far as to insinuate that Dan Brown, the author of the novel The DaVinci Code, should be sued for insulting the Church. Scary beyond words.

Finallt, it is also the reason why religious leaders to such a large degree are insisting they be preeminent in all areas of life, including even in the teaching of Intelligent Design-just another euphemism for creationism-as a viable scientific theory as to the origins of life and the universe. Which is, of course, as any halfway sane person understands, insane.

But how else can you control peoples minds, if you cannot control first their educations. Only then can you control their morals, and through them, by way of guilt, the people themselves. It’s the same old story that caused heads to roll in Russia in 1917. And,if they ever get that degreeof power again, I am confident that they will fail to grasp the lessons of hisotry, and so eventually, as they become more and more pervasice, and corrupt, eventually their heads will roll as well. But not in a span of time that is suitable or acceptable to me.

If anybody wonders as to the whys and wherefores of the so-caled culture wars here in America, realize that it doesn’t really matter which side draws first blood. The only thing that matter is the rivers of blood that might well eventually result. And it is all really so very, very unnecessary.

Would You Like Flies With That?

It looks as though gator season is now going to be not only open, but permanent, year long, day i and day out, wit no limits. If you are a gator, that is, hunting humans. Ther have already been three fatalities involving alligator attacks on young women, one being a 23 year old woman from Louisville, who was attacked whie snorkeling. Her attacker was captured, pending forensic identification with the gators teeth to the bite marks on the body of te unfortunate woman, who died by a combination of blunt force trauma and drowning.

It was somewhat easier to identify the killer of one of another victims. One of her arms was inside the stomach of the gator that was captured shortly after the attack, after the animal was euthanized. What struck me odd about this incident, in patcular, is tat alligators genraly do not behave in this fashion. In most cases of a successful alligator attack upon a human being, the victim is submerged deep within the animals habitat, and given some time to, shall we say, ripen. Or so I have heard. I guess it is possible this could be a way to feed their young. But it could be something else. Like, say, starvation worsened by fierce competition amongst an overpopualtion of gators, in an ever shrinking habitat.

Desptie these incidents, one woman was intimidated by local authorites when she shot and killed an alligator who threatened to enter her home, with an eye on her dog, and so trapping the two of them within her tailor as the beast tried to force itself through her screen door. Having broke the law by the most hairsplitting of technicalities, she was threatened by said authorites with a fine and jail time (These are the kinds of sons-of-bitches, incidentally, who should be tied on skis and dragged behind a pontoon boat at five miles an hour in the middle of Okeefanoke Swamp, in my honest and outraged opinion).

What is obvious about these recent incidents is that one, there are too many people, and, two, there are also too many alligators, and that, therefore, three, these were tragedies that were all but predestined. Alligators are nothing if not living, breathing, killing machines, and require, and will seek, a minimal amount of food. Put too many of them in a limited area, add ever increasing human encroachment within these areas, resulting in further dereases in the animals habitat, and you can only expect one thing. And so far this year, it has happenned at least three times with tragic results.

And so, alligator season has started early. An old encironmental program from the 1970’s which aimed at restoring the alligator population, which at the time was an endangeed speices from an overabundance of hunting for chiefly it’s hide, has worked far too well. The policy against hunting has been finally reversed, but too late it seems for any short time good. The only answer would seem to be to extend the season as well, well past the time it nomally would end.

I have an aunt, recently widowed, who is thinking about getting married to a person she was recently introduced to by her former in-laws, in fact he is her late husbands nephews wives father. She plans on going down to where he lives, the Everglades, for about two weeks, and has promised to bring me some alligator meat upon her return. I just hope she doesn’t end up as alligator meat. But she seems unconcerned.

Florida-it might be a beautiful state to visit, but if you go there to live, you have to be crazy as hell. If you ever get a chance to look an alligator straight i the eye, you would kow what I mean. You might look at it and say, what an awesome creature. But as it looks at you, staring coldly and intently, it’s thinking probably one thing. Man, that sure would hit the

Coyote Ugly

It has been going on behind the ascenes to a great extent, as you seldom hear about it on the national level, but there has been an uptick in reetn arrests of illegal immigrants, with the prospect of heavy fines for those who employ them. I can only assume this to be the case, as there have been a number of such arrests lately. Not in Arizona, not in Colorade, not in New Mexico, not in Califoria, but in-Kentucky. Northern Kentucky, to be exact, right across the river from Cincinnati, Ohio.

I can only assume it is going on in other locales, as I received this news from my local Lexington NBC affiiate, WLEX, Channel 18. No mention of it yet on the national news. Yet, the recent arrests involved Mexican immigrants, undocumented, who were working for home construction contractors.

Ding Ding! So there you have it. The reason for the heretofore, up until just recently, housing boom. It cost contractors appreciably less to build these homes than it would if they hired American workers. Were they dependant on the latter, wages would on average of necessity be higher, and in addition there would be social seurity, etc.

Yet strangely enough, this has not seemed to translate into lower prices for houses, certainly not in a great many areas. You can only assume that in California, for example, the percentage of undocumented workers would be greater than is the case in Kentucky. Yet I can promise you the price you would pay for a five bedroom, three bathroom home in Kentucky, with a basement, bricked, with a surrounding stone wall fence and an attached two car garage, on two acres of land,with a heated back yard swimming pool and tennis courts-would probably buy you a little five room total unbricked, unfenced cottage, no basement, no garage (attached or otherwise), no swimming pool, on a quarter acre lot-if you were lucky enough to find one already buildt in a neighborhood that would doubtless be of dubious quality at best.

Nor by any means does this mean that such a house would be cheap by Kentucky standards. What it does mean is that, in most cases, the benefits of hiring undocumented workers does ot seem to have “trickled down” from employers to the public at large-at least ot in the housing market.

It is, or has been, legalized slavery. And we have all benefited from it. Nor will it change if it is allowed to continue. What a lot of liberals have been advocating in the way of open or semi-open borders seems to be in the hopes that an influx of immigrants will eventually necessitate a gradual improvement of the standard of living in Mexico, and eventually lead to more votes for Democrats, who will then hopefully increase the wages of the undocumented, soon to be legalized, immigrants, and then all of us. The immigrants who come over legally, from Mexico and other nations, will just have to stand in line a little bit longer. After all, they obviously aren’t as desperate, therefore their need isn’t as great. Or, if we insist on fairness, we can just let them all come in. After all, we are now living in a global village, remember-a “New World Order”.

I call it putting the cart before the horse. I call it insanity.

And I smell a big Democratic Party disapointment. Oh, they will likely win the up-and-coming elections, maybe even take over one or even both houses of Congress. But not by enough of a margin to really exercise any meaningful control. Certainly by not enough of a margin to impeach Bush, as a lot of liberals would like and will probably demand, reality be damned (as usual).

A clue for members of both parties who are obstinatwely refusing to be firm on this issue, for thir own self-serving reasons. Americans care first and foremost about their own futures and, more importanly, about the potential future welfare of their children. And they don’t like the smell of what is going on.

But for the time being, they are playing at being tough. Just yesterday evening, border control agents, acting on tip from a citizen informant, attempted to pull over a suspected human smuggler-a coyote-who refused to pull his SUV over, and in fact tried to ram the agent between his vehicle and the slowed traffic in the far lane of the road at one of the busiest border crossings in the south. He was repeatedly arned, and then finally shot dead, after another border agent broke in with a baton his right front passenger window. He was shot five times, and five men were taken into custody.

It might in time get even more violent, more ugly. But if it does, blame first and formeost those in power who have allowed this situation to deteriorate to this point to begin with

Language You Can Understand

The United States Senate has actually done something intelligent and far-sighted, for once, something that is definitely unusual for them, though granted it reeks of pandering. As I always say, it is easy to do the right thing when it is convenient to do so, maybe not so easy when it isn’t. In this case, I definitely am not complaining that the United States Senate has voted by nearly a two to one margin to name English as the national American language. This mandates that anybody that goes to school in the US, no matter where they are from, will be required to learn English. A little bit trickier is the obligation of al limmigrants to learn the language, which should be amended from the bill. But at it’s essence, the Bill is correct in it’s assertion that all immigrants that would become Amrican citizens, should strive to assimilate. To me, it is not so important that a first generation immigrant become fluent in English. As good as that would be, it is too impractical to expect. Their childen, however, should definitely assimilate. Otherwise you have to all intents and purposes a divided country, with divided loyalties, and you are right back to the prospect of a segregated society.

Maddeningly, I have no doubt that the majority of the 34 some Senators that voted against the Bill, if not all of them, are Democrats. I don’t honestly think they did so with the goal of producing a divided country. I do, however, think they are pandering to what makes up a strong and influential segment of their base, who do want just that.

Regardless, the Bill is indeed far sighted. Suppose the Bill ultimately fails to pass, or is, as I fear might be the case, thrown out on constitutional grounds by a leftist leaning judge. The implications of this might not be so obvious immediately, but down the road, they are staggerring. As sure as night follows day, assumming the largest minority language remains Spanish, and this grows to become a significant portion of the popualtion, it would be easy to imagine the time when it is mandated by law that the country become bi-lingual, with the accompanying requirement that both English and Spanish be taught in public schools.

Truthfully, while I do not see this happening, I can see it being proposed and becommng a real issue, and a very divisive one at that. From that point on, it come easily become madatory policy for televison broadcasts to be repeated in Spanish, or shown seperately on some Spanish language alternative channel availiable throughout the country. This would probably drive up expenses across the board.

And I know it is too easy to really let yuur imagination get carried away with all these scenarios, but one thing cannot be avoided, and that is the alternative to all this. This would become a very truly divided country. Only the divisions would be felt not just across regional borders, but in most if not all neighborhoods and cities across the country.

The good thing about the Bill, isthat while it identifies English as the national language of the country, it does not discourage anglo or othe students from learning Spanish, or for that matter any other language, and in fact points out the very real and obvious benefits of this. Still, there has to be a common ground and beginning point, and it only makes common sense that this be with English as the national language. From that point on, we can grow as a nation with a common culture, regardless of what your nation of origin might have been three or four or more generations in the past. After all, how united can the country be if a vast segemnt of the popuation can’t so much as ask for directions from the other.

The Karmic Debt Of Jerry Dean

Audrey Marcum is probably smiling somewhere, wherever that is, if she is aware of the results of the last Jackson County election for Jackson County Court Clerk, which her former boss, and accussed murderer, Jerry Dean, lost to his opponent, Donald “Duck” Morris, by a margin of nearly two to one.

The funny thing is, while Dean was in jail awaiting trial for the murder of Ms. Marcum- who he was accussed of gunning down in her garage after she, his former employee, had filed a sexual harrassment lawsuit against him – he felt obliged to yet run for re-elction to the post he had held for several terms, and in which he was a well like and respected public figure. Yet, even though he was acquitted of the murder, even taking the stand in his own defense, he lost his bid for re-election by a considerably smaller margin.

Then, the anguish and controversy was still fresh in the publics mind. This last time out, he was certain he would be redeemed, and an acquaintance remarked on camera, that people would forget about it eventually. I guess this theory was based on the cliche’ that Americans are a forgiving people, that voters have short memories.

But the voters memories in this case evidently weren’t that short, and they are not that forgiving. Yet, it was not probably so much the suspicous circumstances of the yet unsolved murder, or even the affair, as it is the crassness of this run for office so relatively soon. Especially seeing as how in court Dean was obliged to read a letter he had written to Ms. Marcum which laid out in no uncertain terms the facts of his interest in and sexual pursuits of her.

After all, Dean was running fo roffice in a county that voted overwhelmingly for George W. Bush, based to a large degree on the perception of a call for ethics and morality in public

If Dean expected anything other than this, I guess he got something I seriously doubt he was ever sucessful in getting from Audrey Marcum- fucked.

An Informed Decision

Well, I walked down to my little neighborhood elementary school and did my civic duty, by casting my ballot for the one and only race in which I, as a registered Democrat, was qualified to vote in, a primary election between two Democratic candidates for the office of U.S. House of Representatives from the Fifth District of Kentucky.

Who did I vote for? Hell if I know, it was the first time I had ever heard of either damn one of these guys, neiter one of whom has a snowballs chance in hell of defeating theRepublican incumbent, Harold “Hal” Rogers. Yes, that is the folksy way he is usually listed on ballots, I guess to make you realize he’s a regular guy kind of person.

You see, theFifth District is overwhelmingly Republican, thanks in large part to my county, which is three to one Republican over Democrat. So, why do people vote for this guy. Well, because he is a Republican , of course, and one whop over tecourse of time has come to wield enough power and influence that he has managed to bring home his share of federal money to the area. He is now Chairman of the House Appropriations Sub-committee, so he has some clout. So much so, that the Fifth District of Kentucky is soon to become a new bastion in the War on Terror. In fact, it has been described as, potentially, the next Oak Ridge, Tennessee.

Evidently,that means money for the training of first responders to chemical and biological weapons attacks. Well, so now he has something to show to answer for all the money that has been hidden, I mean, that has gone to a number of organizations and charities with which he has been connected. Only one of these organizations is Operation Unite, of which I have previously ranted as the group of anti-drug warriors that somehow managed to overlook the sleaze bag that used to live across the street from me and who burned down her house, according to rumor, in order to acquire insurance money to payoff a drug debt.

This of course is probably just another boondoggle of similar quality, and I see no promise in it, just another means to funnel money from the good congressman as a patronage gimmick, with the potential for kickbacks to be redirected his way. Of course, there is the possibility it could draw further interest and investment to the area, I will be open minded enough to assess the potential for that, and I will be on the lookout for it. But for now, I have to conclude it is probably just another gimmick from the man whose supporters thought he was of sufficient character to rename the old Daniel Boone Parkway “Hal Rogers Way”.

I still can’t recall the name of the man I voted for in the Democratic primary to run against Rogers in the fall, though he did win by about a four to one margin against his opponent, probably because most of those who voted for him did so for the same reason I did. His was the first name. But I will still vote for him the the general election. You don’t have to kill bears with your bare hands to get my vote. But you do have to be genuine. Otherwise, at least pass some of the pork my way. I’m hungry. Most people that get it are just fat, and greedy.

Weah, Hello

Most of the time you see an artists rendition of the mythical Gorgon Medusa, you are looking more into the soul of the artist than you are at a realistic depiction of the face of sheer terror. Way too often, the depiction is lacking in horror. In fact, the woman will seem plain, if not outright feminine, possibly even attractive, at times even beautiful. Perhaps her face will exude an aura of menace, of evil, but just as often she might seem sad, morose, angry, or even herself fearful-sometimes she might appear comic. In full figured representations you find yourself gazing on the form of a beautiful model, who merely happens to have the unfortunate characteristic of snakes growing out of her head where there should instead be hair. As many times as not, even this seems to add to her attractiveness.

Now, thanks to the Greek artist Oekaki, I am able to present to you what I have always wanted to see, an actual legitimately artistic representation of everything Medusa should be. Sheer, unadulterated terror.

After all, in myth, this entity was born when, after the castration of Uranus by his son Cronus, the latter flung the severed genitals of his father into the ocean, which resulted in several drops of blood splatterred upon the ground. One of these splatters of blood upon the earth formed the wild winged horse Pegasus. From the other, Medusa was born. Yet, in later myth, Medusa was depicted as one of three of the Gorgons, and was described as the mortal one of the three, due possibly to her symbolic birth from the soil of the earth.

I think it was the poet Robert Graves who postulated that the myth of the Medusa was probably based on the use of prophylactic masks in certain goddess cults of Mychaenaean times, specifically singling out the cults of Athene and Hera, who may have used these masks to ward off evil and to frighten away the intruders and curious. This is possible, but I have as yet been made aware of no archaeological or otherwise recorded discoveries that attest to the truth of this. Until such time, we have no way of knowing whether Medusa predated the Hellenic peoples of Classical Greece among the Mychaenaeans, or, for that matter, whether she was adapted from them. Nor can we be sure whether or not she was previously seen in the same manner as she came to be seen by the latter day Greeks with whom we are much more familiar.

Whatever the case, the terrible aspect and ideal of Medusa represents a work of genius of the ancient imagination. She is the face of mortals’ most dreaded fears. To look into her face is to be confronted with, and paralyzed by, all of those fears, all of those that are both personal to the observer, and are unconscous and racial to all mankind. All of those of which we are conscously aware, and at the same time those which reside in the darkest recesses of the unconscous mind.

After all, she was born from the act of castration, itself an innate fear of all men, and so fitting that she should be represented as a female figure, by a culture who itself seems to have taken an untrustworthy view of the feminine sex. Yet, in addition, every snake which protrudes from the Medusas’ head can rightfully be seen as potentially an individual fear, a fear of something-

Poverty, disease, guilt, pain, sufferring, death, loneliness, isolation, humiliation, betrayal-all of those things which have plaqued mankind and turned us all into a global village of neurotic idiots.

This, then, is the accurrate face of Medusa. Look well upon her visage, and thank the artist Oekaki for his vision, and perhaps also for having the kindness for not having her looking directly our way. That may have been too much for us. It may, in fact, have been too much for him. On the other hand, as FDR himself once said-

“The only thing we have to fear is fear itself”. That, and maybe an angry woman with a sharp knife.

Sometimes It Just Don't Pay To Be A Bitch

Father John Robertson committed a crime which seems to have come straight from the pages of a Father Andrew Greeley novel. Using a sharp letter opener, he stabbed a nun multiple times, right inside the church, right at the altar, covering her with an altar cloth of some sort as he did so. The stab wounds, which he inflicted after strangling her into unconscous submission, formed the pattern which was reminiscent of the upside down cross. Additionally, he “annointed” her head with her own blood, an act which has ben theorized as being meant to add to the humiliation of the victim.

This was twenty years ago, and though Robinson was briefly investigated as the possible perpetrator, he was quickly absolved of the crime. He seemed to be unconcerned at the degree of suspicion that was cast his way. He performed the nuns funeral mass. After so long, the case was quickly forgotten.

Due to increased interest in solving formerly unsolved crimes due to advances in forensic technologies, the case was reopened, and this lead to Robinson apartment and offices being searched, which turned up the letter opener. As it turns out, the implement held a few trace, microscopic drops of blood, which contained enough of the nuns DNA to provide a positive match.

Robinson has now been found guilty of the crime, for which, unlike a good Andrew Greeley novel, there seems to be not much of a motive. Insofar as is currently known, the nun was a harsh taskmistress, a serious, no-nonsense disciplinarian who may have been something of a busybody. No word on whether there was the potential that she may have had knowledge of other unsavory activities her murderous colleague may have been indulging in.

What I find most incredile of all about this unbelievable story, is the sentence-five years to life.

Are they fucking kidding? That means of course that this priest might well get out of prison after serving a mere five years for this heinous, undoubtedly torturous and painfully cruel act. Of course, he probably will not. The chances are quite good that he will spend the rest of his life in prison. On the other hand, who knows for sure?

This is one of those crimes that call out for the death penaly, and why I am all for it, in general. If somebody like this has the potential of being released after only five years, in a state that has the death penalty, how much more lax will sentencing be if the death penalty ever is done away with. After all, prison rights reformers/activists, if the death penalty is ever sucessfully done away with, will need another issue to champion, right? So, we go back then to that tired old scenario where crimes are to be blamed more on the society that spawned the criminal than on the actual perpetrator, who should be shown some degree of compassion, and maybe given yet another chance to make amends, to contribute to society in positive ways. I see the handwriting on that wall all too well.

And that is definitely enough to make you want to kill somebody.

Somewhere Under A Sand Dune

A lot of times you can learn some interesting shit watching Jay Leno, shit you might not ever hear about anywhere else, which is the case with this story-at least I have as yet to hear it repeated anywhere else. It seems that a Saudi man received surgery which resulted in the successful reatachment of his penis, which had been cut off - by his maid.

Unfortunately, this report did not include the name of the Saudi individual in question, but I can only assume he must have been one of the wealthier citizens of the oil rich state. Most Saudis are actually quite poor, too poor to have maids, so he is one of the wealther ones, obviously. Additionally, he shares the dubious distinction with yet another ndividual, whose name as of now aggravatingly escapes me, who underwent a similar ordeal, in being the unluckiest, and at the same time luckiest, individual on the planet. In this latest case, of course, how lucky he is is tangential to the degree of success of the operation.

As for the maid, incidentally, unlike the man, I think I do know her name-

ONE DEAD BITCH!!

Tom Cruise Is A Fucking Jerk

Katie Holmes is one crazy, neurotic, beautiful bitch. Yeah, I put her right up there with Jolie and Zeta-Jones, only maybe even more so. There is something about selfishness, petulance, and silliness in females that I find perversely attractive. But I think it is just that fucking crazy look she has in her eyes, that slight hint of near insanity that gleems out at you. And of course she’s crazy, why the hell else would she marry a fucking nut like Tom Cruise-even if it is a sham, a fraud. A show marriage.

But what the hell is it for? And why the hell would I in my wildest imaginings go to see Mission Impossible Three, an act which would require me to drive twenty miles in a vehicle that is unfortunately a gas hog. Nope, not worth it. Nor would I see it if it is in walking distance, in fact I would probably agree to see it only under certain conditions, like for example, if I was forced to sit through it at gunpoint.

Why? Well, it really has nothing to do, at least not directly, with Cruses infatuation with the Scientology religion of which he has become such an insufferably sickening proponent. In fact, he has seemed to tap that tendency down, lately. Nor does it have to do with the fact that I think he is using Miss Holmes (and she him) for the sake of publicity, or to be blunt, appearrances. I do, however, fear that he is going to ruin her career, and maybe her life, ultimately. She may deserve it, or may have at one time, but now I think she has been taken past the point where she really has any thing like a free will.

But no, my objections to even the idea of patronizing this movie, even as good as it is said to be, goes right back to his obsession with Scientology. And from there, the Comedy Central network. And the little cartoon series, South Park. Because of Cruses objections, a segment which was run once, which poked fun at the religion of Scientology and of several of it’s celebrity adherents-including, notably, Cruse, of course-was not re-run. Cruse threatened not the network itself, but the parentn company, who also, it turns out, are the producers of Mission Impossible Three.

So how exactly did Cruise threaten the company? Simply put, if they allowed the segment to be repeated, he would refuse to promote the movie. Thus, I would have been denied the pleasure of seeing him last night on Jay Leno, for those roughly first two seconds of his appearrance before I turned off the channel. This was just too much for the company to bear, and I honestly can’t fault them for making this obvious business driven decision. I think they could have forced Cruise to promote the movie, probably, under the terms of his contractural obligations. But what would that be worth?

“So Tom, tell us about your new movie?”

“Ah, it’s okay. I’ve done better.”

And so you have yet another example of a minority that demands the rights guaranteed to the minority, that turns right around and tries to deny the rights of everybody else when it seems to be in their best interests to do so. That’s why I wouldn’t go see this movie, and would hope to convince as many people as possible not to see it as well. After all, didn’t Cruise insult the Mafia when he filmed “The Firm?” To say nothing of corporate lawyers? That’s two despised minority groups right there he insulted. Well, the lawyers anyway. Didn’t he insult a good many Vietnam veterans when he filmed “Born On The Fourth Of July?” And what was all this fucking shit about “A Few Good Men”? Hell, he jumped on the anti Guantanamo bandwagon with that flick almost ten years ahead of time. But he can’t take a little criticism? Bullshit!!!

Cruise is just another spoiled Hollywood elitist actor, in my view, who doesn’t deserve anyones patronage. Like his misnamed infant daughter, a pickpocket who thinks he’s royalty.

Cinco De My Ass

A sure sign that a large segment of the Hispanic population of the United States, if not the majority of them, are more Pro-Latino Nationalist than they and a good many of their supporters would like you to believe, is their obsession with the relatively recent, to America, phenomenon of the celelbration of the Mexican holiday of Cinco de Mayo. The political impications are obvious to me, given the current national mood and controversial nature of the illegal immigrant issue.

This is more than just a Mexican version of the Irish Saint Patricks Day, which has become as much an all around American tradition, in this country, as it is an Irish one. Cinco de Mayo reeks of Mexican nationalism, in fact that is what it openly celebrates. Ordinarily, I would not begrudge them this, as they certainly have a right to the holiday and the celebration of it, however way you slice it. I just can’t help but feel that an Anglo whose loyalties are unknown would be looked upon with suspicion by the masses of Latino celebrants, should he find himself in the middle of one.

Actually, I wonder just what the hell it is they are celebrating. Are they perhaps actually looking toward the future in a more symbolic way than they would care to admit? I know that question may itself reek of a sense of paranoia, but the situation being what it now is, I can’t help but wonder. Maybe I am reading too much into it. After all, probably most of the Latino population celebrates the holiday in an appropriately festive way, with no underlying feelings of anarchistic or rebellious attitudes. All perfectly innocent. But there is that undercurrent. Okay, call me a worry wart. Maybe it is all perfectly innocent, and maybe I should just lighten up.

On the other hand, what the hell are they celebrating? Unless I am mistaken, Cinco de Mayo is supposed to be a celebration of the Mexican rebellion against and overthrow of the French, who attempted to impose themselves on the people of Mexico, which they desired as a colony. I guess this relates to the capture and execution of Maximillian, a puppet king of Mexico, and descendant, I think, of Napoleon, who was installed by the French-or was it the Austrian Hapsburghs? Or was it both? Does it really matter? The Mexicans won that one, God bless ‘em. While they are celebrating that victory, maybe they might want to look anew at the way things turned out in the aftermath. Not too well, I tend to assume.

In fact, Mexico from that point on didn’t so much begin a long downhill slide, it had already spent a good many years in that precarious predicament. But from this point on, it was a sudden drop straight down to the depths. You are looking here at a nation that has spent almost the entirety of it’s independent history as a feudal fiefdom divided pretty much among a relative handful of wealthy families who pretty much control the nations wealth and infrastructure, and civil services, and agriculture, and what industry there is to speak of, and have continued to do so with the grip of an iron hand. Thank God for tequilla and mezcal, I guess, if you’re going to celebrate, you need something to help you forget you really don’t have a damn thing to party about.

It just don’t make any fucking sense. Not to me, anyway. A generalized celebration of Mexican culture, now that would be something I could certainly understand, no mystery there. But Cinco de Mayo? That makes about as much fucking sense as celebrating the overthrow of the Alamo.

Blue Jacket

It would probably take a historian who is a specialist of the Ohio valley region to be familiar with the story of Blue Jacket, the Shawnee Chief who sided with the British against the colonial era settlers during the Revolutionary War, and who was a brutal and bloodthirsty enemy of the white settlers afterwards. But this same Blue Jacket has been the subjectof a yearly Pioneer Playhous type historical drama for some years to come. Unfortunately, this might soon become a thing of the past. Due to lack of funding, the current season might well be cancelled, unless the organizers of the yearly outdoor drama can mount a succesful drive for the solicitation of funds amounting to an estimated fifteen thousand dollars or more. It might be due to economic consdierations. These are not the best of times to engage in frivolous travel activities, is my guess. Or, it could be simply that the drama has just gotten old and might seem a little too tame by the standards of modern entertainment. Remember, this is a family drama. Or, it could simply have run it’s course, at long, long last. Hell, even Hello, Dolly, Oklahoma, and Showboat closed eventually. Nothing lasts forever.

From what I have learned thus far, it seems to have nothing to do with protests from politically correct Native American Rights activists and their allies. So, I have, alas, nothing there to bitch about. But I will be fucking damned if I will let that stop me.

Blue Jacket was, from all accounts, a bloodthirsty monster who stands among the top of the heap as being a main reason for the disintegration of relations between colonial white Americans and American Indians. Colonial white settlers were brutal and barbaric, as well, of that I have no doubt, and they bear their share of the burden (please note-they, not we, bore their share of the burden), but Blue Jacket, and others, were equally savage, possibly more so.

They sided with the French in the French and Indian War. Then, they sided with the British in the Revolutionary War. Then, they sided with the British yet again, in the War of 1812. On all these occassions, and times in between, they exhibited a predilection and a lust fo rbutchery that was remarkable in it’s bloodthirstiness. This period of time, in fact, from roughly 1753 until the closing of the War of 1812, would be the period that would mark and forever color the relations between American and Indian.

This is not meant to excuse the brutality and the excesses of the Americans in the following decades, but to explain it. Just the other side of the coin you are hardly if ever presented with. Unfortunately, if the outdoor drama Blue Jacket can not somehow be salvaged, it will be further clouded in mist. If for no other reason than this one alone, I hope the play continues.

The Great American Smoke Out

Some fucking idiotic genius in Vermont has decided that the prison system of the state, probably filled to the brim and possibly overflowing with cocksuckers and other assorted rapists, theives, murderers, and similarly oriented lowlifes- that shall we say are by their natures not wrapped the tightest, either mentally or emotionally- should be smoke free. Bad for their health you see, especially those who are non-smokers, those whom modern scientists have declared in it’s infinite wisdom to be at greater risk of smoking related diseases due to second hand smoke. Oh, you know who they are, they are called targets.

Vermont, in other words, has accomplished the impossible. They will have, in short order, created a breed of prisoner that will soon rank lower in the social prison order than child molesters-the non-smoker. One prisoner has already been assaulted, in the middle of a card game. It can only get worse from here. And despite what you might think, it will not get better with time, despite the offering of smoking cessation classes, and the opportunity for pisoners to “taper off gradually”.

Maybe the new pill that has recently been announced as an anti-smoking aid will help. Supposedly, it targets the area of the brain that is affcted by smoke, and decreases the degree of satisfaction to be gained from cigarrettes. So, you now have to smoke three or four cigarrettes to get the satisfaction normally afforded by one. Sweet.

If the Democratic Party wins the coming election, look for this program to be expanded in other facilities throughout the country. Oh, yes, that’s right,.prisons were not the first. And, no, they will not be the last.

Robespierre, the bastille awaits.

Bill Clinton Feels Our Pangs

I’m starting to wonder if maybe Bill Clinton is as depraved as his detractors say he is. I mean, what the hell is he thinking? Here is a man who has devoted enormous sums of time and energy, while recovering from triple bypass heart surgery (and don’t forget the followup surgery to relieve post operative fluid buildup) globetrotted the world, championing various causes. He has been a proponent of business development in India, a tireless advocate for AIDS research in Africa and China, he has travelled alongside the former President Gorge H. W. Bush in order to amass funds for relief efforts ranging from the Indonesian tsunami disaster to the US Gulf Huricane Katrina and Rita tragedies.

Then, just when you think he must have finally decided to relax somehwere with a nice cigar and blow job, up he pops with an announcement that he has brokered a deal whereby American schools will no longer carry soft drinks. That is to say, no carbonated beverages, though the schools in the affected areas will still carry diet soft drinks, but only the high schools. There is still yet some question about the safety of artifical sweteners, enough so to exclude even this option from elementary and middle schools.

Instead, the schools will offer bottled water and fruit juices, which, incidentally, carry as many or more calories typically than your average carbonated cola beverage. I point this out because the main point of this so-called breakthrough in childrens health is that it is meant to combat the scourge of childhood obesity.

Okay, I don’t really mean to undermine it, childhood obesity and all it’s attendant illnesses is indeed a serious problem, and seems to be getting worse every year. The increase of juvenile diabetes is especially troubling, but the long range effects are consdierable as well, not the least of which is the potential for heart disease. So yes, it’s a problem, and yes, it is worthy of the efforts of a former President.

But shit now, talk about treating a bullet wound with a band aid, but this is some really piddling shit here. To be fair, there is also an emphass on recommendations for exercise, but why this even greater emphasis on carbonated cola drinks? I mean, is this leading up to something?

It would seem to me that, in addition to the need for exercise, the main emphasis over and above everything else would be, or should be, insuring healthy, well balanced meals. One that would include water and fruit juices as a required cafeteria serving with a healthy but not overfilling portion of lean meat (preferably baked or broiled) or fish, along with a serving of two vegetables (preferably steamed or served fresh) and one of fresh fruit, and a slice or two of good whole wheat bread. Hell, add a slice of pie and cake for dessert, at least once a week, what the fuck. Remember, balance and exercise, that’s the key.

But this? No, something just isn’t right here. I see a lead up to yet another series of class action lawsuits, to be frank, and I don’t like the smell of it.

Curse Of The Hillary Beast

Evidently, somebody forgot to tell the people of Lexington Kentucky that the Repubican Party is on it’s way out, because even if this much is true, it would appear that at least in the Bluegrass, Republican politics is alive and well-strong, in fact. All you have to do to realize this is to watch the local Lexington tv stations on which, at any given time of the day, you are likely to see a television ad on behalf of Lexington mayoral candidate Bill Farmer, a self styled conservative. Yet, more than talking about his own self, and ideas, Farmers ads seem to be more centrally focused on attacks on one of his primary opponnents, Jim Newburrey.

Newburey is, accorrding to the Famer ads, a liberal after the manner of Hillary Clinton-whose smiling face is prominently featured in some of the ads. Farmer accusses Newburey of wanting to implement a Hillary style medical program which, Farmer warns, might well threaten to run doctors out of the Bluegrass State. No explanantion as of yet as to how a mere, lowly mayor of Lexington would accomplish such a milestone achievement, which makes the ad all the more remarkable. Farmers campaign staff evidently has good reason to believe these negative ads are effective. And, so it would seem they are. Newburrey has called on Farmer to remove the ads-a sure sign they have caused him some degree of alarm.

Who do I support for Mayor of Lexington? Anybody but Theresa Issaacs.

Uncle Ernie Fiddles About

Governor Ernie Fletcher has been indicted, just today in fact, for violating state laws regarding state hiring. According to the indictment of the Grand Jury, he went about setting up a special panel to get around these laws, managing to base his hiring of state employees based on not merit, but political patronage. Governor Fletcher might be in some deep shit. Of course, he could reneg on his earlier promise not to pardon himself if indicted, as he did indeed pardon all the others who were faced with that eventuality, ahead of the charges.

Maybe he thought that vow would not be seen as politcal grandstanding, but would provide him with cover from what he asserts is mere politcal grandstanding by State Attorney General Stumbo, a likely gubernatorial candidate for the Democratic Party in 2007. He still, yet today, made that assertion. Speaking in Ashland in response to news of the charges, the Governor insisted the entire investigation was a politcal sham.

Well, sorry Governor, but the people of Kentucky aren’t buying it. According to the latest state wide polls, 57% think the Governor shoud resign from office. A mere 38% think he should remain. 5% are uncertain. Not good news, either for Fletcher himself, or for the recently much bloodied and batterred Repulican Party. The culture of corruption, it seems, like all politics, is local as well.

But this should really come as no surprise anyway, as Kentucky has always been a corrupt state. What the hell else can you assume anyway from a state that passes a law that gives a governor the power to pardon himself? What is eally shameful is that, when it passed, no one noticed, or objected, or, if they did, it was quickly forgotten.

My Avataress

Yes, it is finally time to reveal my new Avatar, and for this one you can thank Rufus, over at GradStudentMadness, whose blog I definitely encourage you to check out, and for which I have supplied a link in the title of this post pending my eventual establishment of a Blogroll. Yes, I am a procrastinator par excellance, and can always find reasons. They are valid ones though.. I don’t want to have too many links on a blogroll, much preferable to have a few standouts. Here are the qualifications.

1. Regularly updated. This is a must. By regular updates, I mean at least once a week on average.
2. Originality. There will be a limited number of politically oriented blogs, and they will be of the highest quality. I do not have to be in agreement with your political philosophy, I just have to appreciate your blogging and wrting style. However, I emphasize, they will be limited. Therefore, know right off that rants against the Booooooooooooooosh Administration, and the “Repugnantcons”, or against the “Demoncraps”, are limiting your chances of being included.
3. Easy on the fucking pictures. They take forever to load, in most cases, when you have an abundance of them, which is why when I update my blog I usually have only one, if any. Today is an exception, one unlikely to be repeated.
4. Political correctness is out of the question. Unless, of course, you can convince me you are merely making fun of it. I can tell the difference. And that goes for conservative style political correctness as well as the more oftenly bashed liberal variety.
5. If you do not allow comments on your Blog, you will not be included. I do not give a rats ass if you are famous. If Craig Crawford can do it on his blog, which will be a likely inclusion, then so can you, Andrew Sullivan and Prussian Blue.
6. You have to join me in a night of group ritual sex.
7. As I stated that you do not have to agree with my points of view, understand as well that I do not have to agree with yours. I know that seems to be a distinction without a difference, but in some cases, depending on the subject matter and person, you would be surprised how often those differences raise their ugly heads.
8. If I have pissed you off in the past, and you have taken me off your blogroll because of it, or have acted like a bitch, don’t come crawling back now for forgiveness. I am not a Christian and I do not believe in it.
9. I am thinking of calling my Blogroll “Pantheon of Blogs”. If you are on it, then, that puts you on the level of a deity, and so you are permitted to act like one-crazy.
10. I was joking about number six.

Well, that’s it for now. Thanks again, Rufus, for the picture, which is evidently an ancient Minoan Goddess, possibly Potnoe Atenoi (Lady Athene), judging by the serpents she holds in her hands. Yes, it is the same goddess as the Hellenic Athene, though she underwent somwhat of a change under Hellenic influence. Though some might refer to perpetual virginity as more of a drastic change, I suppose. At any rate, whichever of the goddesses it is, she is indeed beautiful, and any of my regular readers owe Rufus a true debt of gratitude. I say that beause of what I was originally intending to put on my Blog as my avatar.

You haven’t seen her yet. Oh, but you will-you will.

And They're Off!

I used to know an Anastasia Noonchester who would now be the same age as the lady in the picture on the left. She was just a baby then, but-what the hell, Anastasia, if you Google your name and you come across this post, and if that is indeed you (or even if it is not) send me an e-mail.

And, again, for the lady in the picture, if you are the same person-or even if you are not-good luck on Derby Day. According to hte report in the Lexington Herald Leader, a pretty young stripper/dancer with the right moves might pull in as much as two or three thousand dollars on a single night, and, again acording to the report, dancers and strippers look forward to Derby Day the same way most of us look forward to tax refund day.

So have at it girls, I wish I could be there. Second only to the winnig horses and their owners, trainrs, and jockeys, this is your day and night to shine. What with this and all the other events going on in Louisville during Derby weekend, how can you go wrong? This in addition to all the other races, including the vaunted Oaks, leading up to the most exciting two minutes in sports, the Kentucky Derby itself. I can just see it. Hear it. Fell it. Taste it.

And they’re off. There’s Brother Derek out the starting gate. Side by side with Ron and Paul. Steppenwolfer is edging up by a nose but look out here comes AP Warrior-in front now by a length. Rounding the curve is Lawyer Ron, but up the backstretch comes Sinister Minister. Here comes the final stretch and it’- it’s

POINT DETERMINED!!!!

Prison Break

If I were writing a Mad Magazine parody of the hit Fox Network TV series Prison Break, I know just how it would end. By the time it was over, every single prisoner of Fox River Penitentiary would be in on the break out, with main character Michael bringing up the rear, when, looking behind him, he would see the main guard Bellick and all the other guards right on his tail.

“Are you guards trying to catch us?”, he would ask in typical cornball Mad magazine satire dialogue.

“Catch you?”, Bellick would reply. “Hell no, we’re trying to escape too, from this crazy, unrealistic, non-sensical plotline.”

And there is plenty about the show that requires suspension of belief. The inmates of Fox River penitentiary, for example, have access to phones in the prison yard, and can evidently call out anytime, to any number they wish to call-free of monitoring.

But at last we know now that at least some of the assembled gang that now numbers nine, will escape, at the end of this season, and as the series has been renewed for next season, they will spend the entirety of said next season avoiding capture, while Lincoln and Michael try to prove that Lincoln was framed for the murder of the female Vice-Presidents brother-who actually was not murdered, but faked his death, all in an effort to draw Lincolns father out of hiding. Don’t ask.

I will tell, though, my predictions for the up-and-coming series.

John the Mafia boss will turn out to be involved not only in a betrayal of Lincoln and Michael involving Lincolns former girlfriend in an effort to find the snitch Fibbonacci (whose tetimony put him in prison for life) but will end up having connections to the Vice-Presidents brother as well.

AJ, Lincolns son, will be sent to prison for the murder of his mother and step-father, and will be befriended by Haywire, who will eventually help him to escape, as they will form a bond based on the similarity of the reasons for their incarcerations-patricide. (this is assumming of course that Haywire does not end up joining in on the escape at the end of this season).

As the Vice-President has concerns over strains in her recent alliances, she will have the current President killed, whereby she will assume the office for which she will then run with the power of incumbency, in addition to the warchest that was stolen from her brothers company.

Philly also will end up at Fox River, and will form an alliance with Bellick, who will be his link to the outside in an effort to extract revenge on both Michael and John.

Bellick will also become the new warden of Fox River, after “The Pope” is done away with.

T-Bag will stumble upon the mass murder scene of a family against whom he had wanted revenge, and will be blamed for this murder, which will have been perpetrated by one of Johns Mafia stooges. He will barely avoid capture. Later, he will ass rape the punk ass Secret Service agent.

C-Note, one of those whom John originally planned on killing upon their escape, along with all the others except for two (probably Michael and Lincoln), will become Johns new muscle on the outside when the heat proves too much for him to re-establish contact.

John will find and kill Fibbonnacci.

Sucre’ will murder his cousin over the same woman for whom he stupidly caused himself to be sent to prison in the first place, a cunt I would find the ugly ass Vice-President preferable to.

No, I don’ treally believe most of this will happen, but that’s the good thing about this show, you find yourself trying to figure out just what is going to happen-the hallmark of a great show. And, despite all it’s flaws and shortcomings, it is truly that, an edge of your seat thriller that, once you get hooked, will keep you tuning in, week after week.

Neil Young Declares War

Here is a link for you that is probably getting more hits than a high class hooker on the backstreets of Peoria. Neil Young. Need I say more?

Neil Young is the kind of recording artist who has done it all, and no matter what he does he makes it unique. A true genius that once went slumming in a neighborhood far beneath him when he joined a trite little band called Crosby, Stills, and Nash, outclassing the second class Stills, and the third rate at best Crosby and Nash.

When Graham Nash, along with David Crosby, who laughingly refers to himself as a minstrel, sing protest songs, it can inspire at worst nausea, at best a feeling of either nostalgia or revulsion at the memory of the sixties, but most of the time just chuckles at their irrelevance. The same goes for most of the other 1960’s icons of their day, such as Joan Baez, to whom the current national mood is their one last chance to make the big time, in a way that speaks of more than just good luck and timing.

In fact, I have a theory that David Crosby’s most significant contribution to rock music was the beatles song “And Your Bird Can Sing”. Yeah, I know that was a Beatles song, a Lennon and MacCartney number. Lennon wrote it after he fucked Crosby’s wife.

Be that as it may, Young is a true artistic genius, and when an artist of his calibe devotes an entire album to a protest of the Iraqi War and the Bush MisAdministration, the Christian Far Right and the Neo-Cons have reason to be concerned. They can be excused if they see no occasion to chuckle in derision.

This is definitely worth a listen, if you can find the time. Send the link far and wide. Smoke a doobie while you’re at it. Remember, it’s better to burn out than to fade away.

Napster

Napster may have just earned a permanent home on my Links section. Cehck it out. Five songs, for free. No, no, you can’t download them. You can however listen to them. Okay, clarification. There are more than two million songs in Napsters archives. Each one of those songs-yes, each and every one of them-you can listen to, for free, a total of five times each.

Yes, five times each. After that, if you want to listen to it again, yes, you have to pay, and I guess you pay even more for downloading. So what? If you like a song so much that you just have to listen to it more tan five times,. isn’t it worth it to dowmload it?

If not, hell, listen to it five times, then listen to something else five times. Shit, there are, like I said, two million plus of them, and more and more will doubtless be added in time.

Plus, there’s a forums section. I guess that’s been there for awhile, I don’t know. What I do know is, Napster seems to have hit on a winning formula and has pulled out of it’s legal troubles in a way which is compatile to it’s own interests, evidently, as well as to the interests of the recording artists.

I for one intend to check out some of the newest offerrings from Pink, who is these days attracting notice as something of a socially conscous performer and critic of the Bush Administration inher own right. I am of the hopes that she is better than your average troubadour, I know for a fact she is cuter.

You Can't Hide Balls The Size of Colberts

Okay, I know I don’t usually jump on bandwagons, but desptie the fact that you hav already heard about the performance of Steven Colbert at the Washington Correspondents Dinner a zillionth time, I feel compelled to make it a zillionth and one. Colbert accomplsihed something few true journalists, even of the reputation of Bob Woodward, have the balls to do, which is to criticize George Buish to his face, and in the presence of his wife at that.

More than that, he criticized the mainstream press for not really doing it’s job, for the most part. While you can point to individual examples of exceptions, such as Helen Thomas and David Gregory, in addition to NBC’s Brian Williams first rate coverage of the Hurricanes Katrina and Rita disasters, most of the press seems to have been cowed. Even Chris mattews, once ferocous as any bulldog in his coverage on Hardball of the Scooter Libby/Joseph Wilson/Valerie Plame/Patrick Fitzgerald, et al., controversy, now seems to have been strangely neutered.

One of the most telling moments of the evening came when Colbert advised the press to go home, spend some time with their families, write that book they’ve always wanted to write, about that fearless reporter standing up to the powerful and corrupt politicans. “You know-,” he said in mock encouragment, “fiction”.

Very few people laughed that evening, including Bush and Laura-or most members of the press. Nor should they have.

I have provided a link in the title, courtesy of “Pissed Off Patricia” of the blog “Morning Martini” (a good politically oriented blog, by the way), in which you can write a word of thanks to Mr. Colbert. My note is, if I remember correctly, number 17,006. I have don’t yet know how many other notes have been written since mine, but by all means, please add to the number.