Thursday, April 26, 2012

Egypt Legalizes Sex Between Muslim Men And Dead Wives-Hillarity Follows

UPDATE-According to The Volokh Conspiracy  the story probably isn't true, but a rumor started by Egypt's military regime, possibly acting in conjunction with the Saudis in an effort to discredit the Muslim Brotherhood. This has been asserted by the Egyptian Embassy in Britain in a report in the Daily Mail.

Two points about this.

One, I wonder why the initial report specified it would only be legal for a man to have sex with the body of his dead wife for up to six hours after her death, but not after that.

Two, what about the report lowering the legal age of marriage to fourteen.

Three, my jokes are still funny, so there's that.

(End of Update)

Granted, its only allowed for up to six hours after the pronouncement of death, but according to this post from The Other McCain, it is now the new law in Muslim Brotherhood dominated Egypt. A way for the bereaved husband, to, uh, well, say goodbye with one last and final, uh, well, you know, what the fuck? But again, and I can't stress this too much, he can only do this, legally, for up to six hours after his wife has died. But not to worry. As compensation for his loss, he now has improved chances of finding a new love, as the marriage age has now been lowered to-fourteen. And yes. This calls for a joke. Actually, a bunch of them.

*Why did the Muslim man have sex with his dead wife? Hey, at least she didn't have a headache.

*Why did the Muslim wife commit suicide? She was tired of being neglected.

*What can you say to make a Muslim husband jealous? She looks so natural.

*Why was the Muslim man so turned on by having sex with his dead wife? It was the first time he'd ever seen her undressed.

*The jokester Muslim teens decided to play a joke on their father by hiding a walkie talkie under the head of their dead mother. They hid in the closet and waited until, sure enough, father entered to have sex with his wife's corpse. Before he mounted her, one of the teens groaned in a voice of passionate ecstasy.

 "You-can communicate with me?" the stunned man asked.

"Yes, I want you, my husband", came the reply.

So he cut her head off.


I know, I'm such an insensitive bigot.