Bars And "Real People"

I admit, I miss the bar scene. I miss the romance, the intrigue, the mystery, and even to a point the danger, that comes with going into a nightclub, mixing with the "folks", listening to the jukebox (while trying desperately to ignore the idiot that is always going to be around trying to impress everybody with how much they can "sing" like the artist on the record), sometimes dancing (sometimes with myself-talk about an idiot), and playing pool if there was a decent table handy, provided the person available to play with just wanted to play to pass the time, for the sheer pleasure of the game. Unfortunately, this doesn't seem to be the case way too often. At times, I like to just sit, and drink, and reflect, at other times I like to engage in the conversation, the off-color banter. And the women? What can I say? It really is true, they get prettier with each drink. Sometimes their quite pretty to start out with. I seem to have noticed another phenomenon, however, that seems to have gone unremarked. The uglier they are, the prettier they seem to get, while the prettier they are-well, you get the picture, I'm sure.

However, the drawbacks eventually drove me from the bar scene, and I have never returned. Most obvious is the drain on one's finances, as well as the threat to one's overall health, and safety. As for the disease potential, you really have to wonder about those cheesy looking little condom dispensers on the walls of the urine stenched bathrooms.

True, I do miss it, and every time I have the opportunity to go, I am told that I should go out more. Get to know some "real people". But the more I stop to think about it, the more they all seem the same. Face it, the more you see of any one person in any given bar, the more likely that person is to be a loser. I caught on to that pretty quick. And as they seem to have the most pull with the barmaids, for a variety of reasons, the presence of the "regulars" seems to permeate the atmosphere, and you either fit in or you don't. Whatever the case, no matter the bar, you are fitting in, if you do, with a bunch of losers, for the most part. Or you are not fitting in, which is a different story all together, and maybe not always a good one.

And so, I have to decide, alas, to decline any further opportunities to meet any of these regulars, these "real people". The real creeps, the real assholes, the real jerks, the real cutthroats, the real thieves, the real con artists, the real whores, sometimes with their real pimps, and all of the real marks, and finally, the real-well, the real drunks. I enjoy an occasional visit to a neighborhood bar, don't get me wrong, in fact, that's just the problem, maybe I like it too much. But sometimes, it is better for a real person to drink in the privacy of his own real home. Or in the company of those within his own circle of real friends and acquaintances. There are very few of these types, it would seem, to be found in a neighborhood bar, and even less hat are quite like myself. Strangely, what few times I meet such people as this, in a bar, I have no real interest in socializing with them.

Besides, I like to mix my own drinks.