Kings-The Book Was Better

NBC has taken a dumb idea and turned it into an absolutely stupid one. The whole idea of setting the Biblical Book of Kings in the modern world isn't really what I'm talking about either. That is actually a brilliant idea. The dumb part is in trying to make what by all rights should be a violent, even a bloodthirsty story, into one that might be a bit more palatable to modern sensibilities.

Ian MacShane is wasted in this garbage. For one thing, he doesn't fit the role. If they really wanted to create a modern King Saul, they should have somebody who is at the very least six-foot-six, and present him as an utter barbarian with maybe the thinnest veneer of civilization. That was King Saul. This modern version, King Silas, cooks breakfast for his family, for God's sake. I suppose I shouldn't be too rough on him. He did manage to order an assassination of one of his more upstart courtiers in the pilot episode, so maybe there's some hope for him. By and large, though, while he does present a regal appearance, he is just too polished in the modern sense of the word.

The David of the story is played by Chris Egan, who is particularly ill-suited for what should be such a compelling role. One hopes he will grow into it, but so far, the only authenticity he brings to the role is that he seems to be as much out of his depth in this part as the original boy shepherd must have been in the court of the original insane tyrant who, while in the depths of melancholy, was known to suddenly hurl his javelin for no apparent reason at anybody who presented a conspicuous target-usually David, whom he suspected of disloyalty.

The Goliath in the story, the one who turned our modern David into the hero who earns the King's favor (by saving the life of his captive soldier son, "Jack") is not actually a giant fierce warrior, but a tank, which he dispatched with a grenade strapped to a wrench. What a waste! Is this the best modern adaptation of the story these writers could come up with? It seemed like something they just did to get it out of the way as soon as possible.

The King has a daughter as well, who is advocating for some kind of nationalized health care. When David takes it upon himself-in the course of his first press conference in his official rewarded capacity of military press spokesperson, no less-to utter words of support for the daughter's pet project, I knew right then and there, this show was doomed to suffer a dismal fate, that of an unfortunate mediocrity. Seriously, nobody would take it upon themselves to do such a thing in an official capacity, especially over an issue that is not even a part of their official job description. The whole thing was an absurd cap on what was already an exercise in banality.

The concept of the show has promise. Well, it had it. I think that promise has been shot to hell with this first ill-advised episode, which made the show seem more like its trying to be Dynasty with vaguely Biblical trappings than an actual modern take on an ancient Biblical epic.

It's a shame too. In the original version, King Saul sunk deeper and deeper into the depths of madness, and it would be interesting to see how MacShane, who is actually a fine actor, would translate that story. Unfortunately, I don't think it will ever make it that far.

Nor do I think there is any danger of rewards being offered, or granted, for every enemy combatants foreskin which is taken in combat. And therein lies the problem with this show. It's bitten off more than it can chew, and it just doesn't have the heart to stay that faithful to the original source material. As such, why even go there to begin with?